Selfish?

I've been feeling both selfish and justified lately, in wishing that Maxx would hurry up and get his car insured and on the road, so that I can have my car back steadily waiting in the driveway, so if I want to use it, all I need to do is walk outside, not hoof it up the hill to my sister-in-law's house, if Maxx hasn't bothered to ask me before going home if I might want to use it that day.

He's asked a couple of times if, when he gets his 1995 beater on the road, if we could then switch cars because I don't need to drive that much, only working in the office once every two weeks, but I have refused.  The Ford Fusion is mine ... it was purchased in my name, I have the insurance, and I have made every single car payment on this car ... as well as the Saturn Vue before it, and the SL1 before it, and the 1978 Ford Granada before it ... so by the time the Fusion is paid off I figure I will have shelled out about $100,000 in car payments.  No way am I trading that in for a POS 1995 car!

Lovely Luna!

Full moon last night, and I got home from my errands about 8pm, so I did have time to hope in a nice hot bath with one of my many bath fizzers, then hold a short full moon ceremony.  Short but sweet, and I felt so relaxed afterwards I lay down on the sofa for a while to watch my candles burning.

I even got to use one of my special candle holders ... it's a tea light holder with a frosted glass moon behind it.   Thought it was very appropriate, except that it is a quarter moon, not full!

Tests and Results

Having my second mammogram this year, as I just turned 41.

I guess it points to my state of emotional and mental health that I almost hope they find something.  After all, if I had to have a mastectomy, I would get my much-needed breast reduction without having to struggle and fail to get down to 178 pounds first ... and having less breast to bounce around being painful and awkward while exercising would be excellent!

Old Age?

I know I've only just turned 41 last week, but sometimes I feel like I'm spiralling swiftly into old age.  My memory is not only no longer what it used to be, but often times fails me completely, and I certainly am not able to multi-task the same way I used to  .... guess this is just what I get to look forward to in the future.

Off Kilter

Just feeling a bit off-kilter this week.  Monday was Jan 6th, and I still haven't been able to figure out for myself if it 'is' my anniversary, or 'was', or 'will be again'.  Wondering if Maxx ever will move back in with me, as he's made no overtures in that direction.

I guess my life is just going to be one endlessly long waiting game.

And I HATE waiting.

Happy New Year

Have I made resolutions for the New Year?  No.

I have, however, tried to make some ongoing plans.  I've been working on eating better and getting more exercise for the past couple of months, and I am going to keep that up.  Started off right this year with a breakfast of oatmeal with a tablespoon of chia seeds (high in fibre, help you feel full) and 1/4 cup of almond milk, with a glass of hot water and a mandarin orange.

I also happened to sleep in until 10am today ... which is actually a good thing, considering how hard I usually find it to get a decent night's sleep.  It was a surprise when I opened my eyes and rolled over to find it was almost 10, so turning off the alarm at 8am and rolling over was apparently the right thing to do.

Now, I need to go a brief tidy on the kitchen table, and plan to do a painting today.  I want to get back into the swing of painting and also doing other crafts, get those creative juices flowing again and see if I can maybe get a few things created that will warrant an online store, to try to get some extra income.  While I may need to purchase more paints, if I get that creative, I certainly have lots of canvases at this time, in varying sizes and shapes!

Hope everyone had a happy and safe New Year celebration, and are ready to kick things off right.